Goodbye Treasured Friend

Zoe Watson 1997-2012

When we moved to Victoria last year our two girls (dogs) went to live with Don's parents in Bundaberg.  It was hard to leave them behind but we knew we couldn't take them with us. 

This morning I found out that Zoe had to be put down two weeks ago, around the same time at Don failed his CPL for the second time.  Don's parents did not tell us at the time,as we were already struggling enough.  She was very old, and her time had come.

She was the most patient and loyal dog.  She always looked liked she was smiling.  She was a fierce watchdog and had a real mothering spirit, even though she had no pups of her own.  In fact she even took on a stray fox pup once and mothered him. 

Don bought Zoe a few years before we met and she has always been a part of our lives together.  She lived a long a wonderful life and boy, will we miss her.  Don doesn't know yet, I have to tell him when he gets home.

I have always said that we can learn much from dogs about love, and it is for this reason I believe that God gave them to us.  Goodbye treasured friend. xx

Strong in Joy

All week these words have been threading their way through he fabric of my heart. 

Don’t be dejected and sad, for the joy of the Lord is your strength!” (Neh 8:10)

Don’t be dejected and sad

thotabu
You are grieving 

I love that the Hebrew is just so direct and infinitely more colourful than our own language. Grieving really sums up the condition of my heart at late. I have been wondering where my joy had gone. I felt numb and somewhat like I had failed. God has been providing many opportunities for me to speak about our love of Him and the amazing ways He has touched our lives. And yet, I felt like in the last few months, that some of my fire had waned. To understand I will share an experience with you. In recent months I recorded a television segment that will go to air on Mother' Day. On the day of recording, I was incredible ill, but still went to record the program. You can read more about that here. Just before Christmas I received the finished program in the mail, edited and ready for the air. As I watched I could see how flat I looked and how I seemed to have no joy while I spoke. I was instantly ashamed. I was ashamed that this was my chance to share with the world, the amazing God that we know, and I could not convey it. It broke my heart, but this is what I saw. Don consoled me and told me that no one would notice and that God would use it mightily. But in my heart I was grieved, like I have somehow let God down.

Two nights ago Jesus spoke to me in a dream. He walked to me from behind and came to sit in front of me, He said,

'Do not forget that I was hated for what I spoke. Do not be surprised if people look upon you in disdain. What I see is beauty itself because of the honesty and obedience of your heart. I told you to go and you went. Leave the rest to me. How you appear on the day is exactly how you need to. Just watch me use this for my Father's glory. Be at peace.'

He smiled at me, lifting one corner of his mouth, and then I awoke.
 

for the joy of the Lord

ki chduth ieue
exhilaration of Yahweh

There is nothing quite like a visit from Jesus to bring joy. The word exhilaration is a much more descriptive word. The joy of the Lord is not something that I take from God. Knowing that I can bring a smile to God's countenance is what gives me strength. Having joy does not mean that I am always happy, but it does mean that I am content and affirmed by His love and joy.


is your strength 

moz.km
the stronghold of you 

I love these words because they reflect who holds the joy. God holds the joy, and in Him I find my stronghold. His joy is the stronghold of me. He is all about me, through me, and in me. His joy, is my hiding place and the place where I can stand on the fortress walls with my arms flung wide and declare my freedom. Now that is the true meaning of joy.

Praying With Others

We live a blessed life.  We know that our path is not an easy one, but we know many who walk a far steeper incline.  We have come to know many families who have problems much greater than our own.  Problems that would threaten to consume them, except for the hope I see in their eyes.  Early in our journey with Sam, God spoke to me about walking with others in their hardships, and holding their hand, not carrying the load they bear.  You see we are each given a cross to carry.  If you know Jesus, the cross you bear will never overcome you because he promises that 'his burden is light', and 'he will never give you more than you can bear'.
Many times I have caught myself sliding toward a deadly drop, because I am holding onto the burdens of another.  All of us have been touched by brokenness and loss in some form or another, during these times we must carry our friends to Jesus, and hand their burdens to him.

It is for this reason that I made a choice some time ago to no longer pray for people...

instead I promise that I will pray with them.

For hope to grow into faith, words must be spoken to God.  Words of honesty  from the heart of the hurting, to the heart of God.  One cannot live on the faith of a friend, we must have our own encounter with God, if our faith is to grow and flourish. 

At the home where we now live, the front lawn is awash with a flood of tiny white daisies.  I watch them, how they begin the day closed, and then as the full sun bathes them, they lift and open their happy faces toward the light. 

When we lift our faces to God and pray, his light will overcome us, and even from a place of darkness, we will know his comfort, and presence.  

I long to see the faces of others shine like these daisies, raising their heads and dancing in the light.  

And so I will pray with you, and wait for God to do the rest.

God and Grief

If you were anything like me the last week has been one of very mixed emotions.  I seem to have walked around in an often dazed state, seemingly unable to do even the slightest everyday household chore.  I have cried with families as they tell their stories of tragedy and rejoiced with people who have been spared and are alive.  I have gone through feeling both guilty and blessed because we are safe and well while so many others suffer.

Yesterday Jesus showed me that what I was experiencing was in fact grief.  Grief  is a strange and almost unrecognisable emotion.  Grief is not just crying all of the the time but comes with mixed emotions such as guilt, frustration and anger.  Everyone shows grief in a different way.  We are told in the bible that grief is a  process of dealing with suffering but that we are ultimately responsible for how it all ends.  Do I choose to give glory to God even in the midst of out trying circumstances or do I choose to curse him? Either way he is listening.  Before you choose to curse him ask yourself when the last time was that you even talked to him or asked his opinion about anything.  People are very quick to state "If there was a God why does he allow things like this to happen?"  I can't begin to answer that question as I don't have the big picture in my hands.  But I know that God does and I trust and hope that even out of this tragedy new life will come, new beginnings, hew hope, new trust, new faith in him.

If you have lost family, home or possessions in this horrible flood I pray for God to love you, hug you, support you in this time when you need him most.  I grieve with you and look forward to brighter days filled with hope and promise.

Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.(Romans 12:15)